April 13, 2011

Hi!  Sorry I have been so distant. Very Busy!   A dear friend texted me yesterday saying I needed to post something.  This is for her.

I am at war.  Yes, strong words.  I have been involved with this issue for over a week now. My property has been attacked. Hit and run. Nothing the police can do.   I’m ready to go all out to defend myself and my belongings.  I have had words with my enemy. He only stares at me and laughs. My anger grows every day. 

 <– Here he is that little bastard!   $hits all over my cars every morning! That stuff is like epoxy!  Especially if I forget and turn on my wipers. It smears like a slug. It’s a horrible mess.  It got all over my car windshield. Took 3 days for it to clean off. I cant scrape the window with anything metal as it has a coating that recognizes rain and controls my wipers.  I actually scratched my NEW CAR windshield trying to get it off.   Every frikkin’ morning. There the sonofabitch is. perched in the branch. “Ha ha ha Oscar!!  Look ! I spelled your name on your windshield!”   That little rat with a tail!.  It is a mess. I have to take my garden hose and spray off both cars.  Those little balls o’ crap stick like magnets. They just don’t wash off! You have to push them, then they smear. THEN its worse.  I’m out there spraying, he’s up there laughing his fuzzy a$$ off! I really am getting angry  and am at my wits end!

But I have a plan…..   muah ha ha ha ha haaaaa!

“Ok Grey squirell, you’re gonna get yours…….”

Hope I don’t shoot my eye out!

Thanks for reading!  I’ll try my best to visit you!



  1. “Oooh…. he’s a dead-eye, ain’t he?”

    Careful you don’t shoot your eye out!

    He’s one brave little squirrel! Sounds like he’s got you pegged and is taking his revenge on you for something! Our squirrels just empty the bird feeders, but they aren’t so brave as to poop on the cars!

  2. Hey I have a bb-gun with pump action and CO2. Call me, I’ll come over and we can get all liquored up and go hill-billy on his ass.

  3. This is too funny. I just left this comment on Bud’s blog too:

    The squirrels in my backyard are organized and militant.

    My father shoots his BBGun at them from his bedroom window, much like a sniper, to get them off the bird feeder.

  4. Shoot one for me they keep eating my garden!

  5. As you’ve read on my blog, be careful, very careful messing with these fellows. They have bad friends in bad places and ways to get even. But I’ve never heard of them messing on cars. You must really be on their S*** list

  6. That would REALLY tick me (and Mr.4444) off!! I hope you caught him. And BTW, your intro got me, hook, line, and sinker! 🙂

  7. Your story sounds like Bill Murray and the gopher in “Caddy Shack.” Very funny!

  8. Little bastards. I’m a big fan of your solution, though! Welcome back to the blogging world!

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